Like the esteemed wordsmith Project Pat once said, "you gotta take the good with the bad" and that's just what the long anticipated opening week delivered to us on the pixel gridiron. We had an interesting first game across the league in many ways and after all the early chatter about how low nfl/fantasy scoring was in week 1, our league median score ended up 102.75ppg, which is just 0.11ppg lower than the 2024 season and no where close to our all time week 1 low in 2023 of 94.2ppg.

Now, the good, bad, and ugly of week 1…

**BRL**™ 1ST ROUND
DEALS & DENTS

League first round pick tracker

It seems natural that we should give the first shout out to the Big Jefe Of The Week, FC Luke, who not only survived the classic CMC “will he/won’t he play?” pregame heart palpitations, but then went on to reach team high score of the week crushing FC Tyler 136.12 vs 104.42. As any good ol’ brotherly rivalry tends to go, they’ve had a very even matchup through the years, but this victory nudges little big brother FC Luke ahead in their all time series.
All time: Luke 5 - Tyler 4

After finally breaking FC Nathaniel’s 5 game win streak last season, FC Eric needed just 7.96 points on MNF from Adam Thielen against his own beloved Chicago Bears, but was left disappointed to both see Minnesota’s 4th quarter comeback, and lose their own game 105.72 vs 99.76 after only 2pts from Thielen. All time: Nate 5 - Eric 1

In a battle for Western PA bragging rights, league newcomer, FC Lizwe, got off to a strong start with their #1 draft pick, Bijan Robinson, scoring 24.4pts in a 12.86pt win against 2018 inaugural season champion FC Matt, 108.81 - 95.94.
All time: Lizwe 1 - Matt 0

(SPONSORED CONTENT)

CONEY ISLAND™
CHILI DOG OF THE WEEK

FC Zane 🌭 set a new land speed league record for earliest week to not roster a full team and unsurprisingly their team did not fare well against the Colorado Kids, FC Nicholas. With a final score of 109.58 - 71.12, the 38.46pt margin of victory was the largest of the week and promptly positions FC Zane into early competition for this season’s coal bin Champion with a league low week score of 71.12pts. 👚🪨👚 All time: Nicholas 6 - Zane 6

SEE YOU NEXT WEEK BEAUTIFUL NERDS!

(hopefully)

Guess who's back, back again....

Hello all you lovable scumbags and welcome to Season 8 of the Zlockie Fantasy Football League where we'll cheer, jeer, complain about healthy players stashed on IR, and generally trash talk our way through to the anointing of the lauded Tiny Trophy 🏆 🪨🏆 and dreaded Pink Shirt 👚🪨👚 of familial shame.

This season we welcome two new football clubs to the league, FC Lizwe and FC Mark & Jon. For their benefit, and the rest of our Miller Lite™ 🍺 addled brains, here's a brief league recap since its immaculate 🙏 inception in 2018:

The league started in 2018 in Kulpmont, PA with 14 teams and in 2019 added the expansion teams, FC Justin and FC Nathaniel. The first league champion was FC Matt and a namesake Zlockie has yet to won the Tiny Trophy. FC Luke is the reining champion, and FC Noah is the only multiple time winner, 2023 and 2020. Astoundingly, we've already had one esteemed team that’s won both the Tiny Trophy and the Pink Shirt, FC Eric, which occurred humbly on back to back seasons, going first to worst in 2021 to 2022. The current lovable coal bin dweller and Pink Shirt champion is, FC Joel. Lastly, only one team in league history has won the Pink Shirt multiple times, FC Alex, in 2020 and 2019.

The league's current Knoebels™🎠 all time high and low water marks are:

*PRE-EXPANSION 2018
Highest team score: 202.42pts - 2018 week 8 - FC Daniel vs FC Luke (202.42 - 100.84)
Largest victory: 132.72pts - 2018 week 11 - FC Frank vs FC Tyler (197.12 - 64.4)
Lowest team score: 42.42pts - 2018 week 1 - FC Zane vs FC Nicholas ( 113.2 - 42.42)
Smallest victory: 0.06pts - 2018 week 16 - FC Zane vs FC Nicholas (93.4 - 93.34)
Best record: *TIE - 9-4 (0.692%) - 2018 FC Frank & FC Matt
Reg season win streak: 5 - 2018 - FC Braden
Worst record: 2-11 (0.153%) - FC Nicholas
Reg season loss streak: (reg. season): 6 - 2018 - FC Nicholas

*POST EXPANSION 2019-2024
Highest team score: 196.02pts - 2022 week 2 - FC Braden vs FC Luke (196.02 - 85.7)
Largest victory: 110.32pts - 2022 week 2 - FC Braden vs FC Luke (196.02 - 85.7)
Lowest team score: 33.5pts - 2020 week 4 - FC Zane vs FC Alex (97.58 - 33.5)
Smallest victory: 0.04pts - 2024 week 14 - FC Luke vs FC Noah (95.46 - 95.42)
Best record: 11-2 (0.846%) - 2020 - FC Frank
Reg season win streak: 9 - 2020 - FC Frank
Worst record: 3-10 (0.231%) - 2019 FC Alex
Reg season loss streak: *TIE - 8 - 2024 FC Joel, 2023 FC Eric, 2022 FC Zane, 2019 FC Daniel